This week marked 17 years for us.
15 years of littles in our home, by my side.
It marked 5 years of us being in Spokane.
It was Briggys first day of Kindergarten.
I've spent the week looking at my kids a little more.
Probably grieving what once was.
In September 2016 I took this picture. Ty is on the left sitting:
I remember loving this park. And kind of dreaming about my future life when I would live next to a park like this. I didn't dream much when we were in that phase of life. I just lived day by day. But at this park, I remember dreaming about my future. Who knew that 5 years later, we would move back to Spokane and live a block from this park!
In September 2021, I took this picture:
Five years later, in August 2026 I took this picture after I dropped Jax, Ty, and Luke off to school and I still had 2 days left with Briggy by my side:
The park is still there. So many changes have happened to the park, but its still standing.
We are still there. So many changes have happened to us but we are also still standing.
Interestingly enough, the sandpit is the one thing that has remained the same. But I digress.
Its hard to mourn the baby years, when I just love who my boys are now.
But also so much of who they were as babies is still apart of them.
Jaxson was so busy. He just always needed to be doing something. That is still him!
Ty was always building things. From LEGO to pepper & salt shakers. Building. That is still him!
Luke was loving on people. With his big smiles and cheesy grins. That is still him!
And Brigham, though most people don't see this side of him, was so incredibly sweet & tender. Still him!
I feel a powerful urgency to make the best out of these next four years. That doesn't feel very longer. I feel worried I will blink and miss it. I feel my heart breaking a little. But I guess that in 5 years when I take another picture at the park, I will probably say the same thing. "Its hard to mourn the boy stage when I just love who my boys are now". And if I were to write one thing about who they are now I would say:
Jaxson is kind. He is always considering everyone’s feelings. He wants to do what’s right. He works hard to reach goals—like getting 100 shots early in the morning. He wants to be cool and kind.
Tyler desires growth. He has started this middle school life with this determination to be his very best. He is always deep thinking—like asking if our gender stays the same once we die. Or if angles have gender.
Luke has become teachable. I can correct his action and he will apologize and try to be better. He’s also passionate. He’s also always talking to his buddies about Jesus.
Brigham is not afraid to strike up a conversation with anyone. Even the 70 year old man at Brucchis. He loves his people deeply—like when he told me he’d miss kindergarten on day 5 to come be with me and that in the mean time, I could go on walks with friends when he’s gone.
I guess this is what life is about.
Changing through the phases.
Keeping the good parts and leaving the bad.
Just like Ben Burr park.
It continues to change its parts, but not its purpose! Which is to provide a play space for children.
And I guess we will continue to change our parts, but not our purpose. Which is to grow closer to Heavenly Father and to become more like Jesus Christ.
So hear is to time! I am grateful that we have it. And I wish sometimes it would go slower.
Here is to 17 years of marriage. Landon is truly the best decision i've ever made. He's my best friend and I love the way he loves me. And I love him!
Below is our first back to school night in Spokane in 2021 and then our 2026 back to school night.
TIME!!!! SLOW DOWN!!!
